Insecure

Hi all. I’m not sure what I’m looking for really but I’m just struggling. I’m 12w1d and feeling really insecure. I am a plus size mama. And I feel my baby bump but I have to lift my belly to feel. I want my husband to feel but he doesn’t really know what he is feeling for. It’s hard not to be mean to myself because I knew going into this pregnancy that I’d be a plus size mom and that it wasn’t as likely for me to show as other moms would. My emotions are all over the place and it’s making me angry to try to explain how I’m feeling to my husband because he doesn’t understand. On top of that the bloating makes me feel bigger and I’m just hating how I’m looking. My body is changing and I know that’s a wonderful and blessed thing to happen to grow this baby but I just wish I had some kind of answer to make me feel better about my self image. Any help or advice would be appreciated. 🥲