Honest advice for a first timer R3 vs R5

Hi all, just after some honest advice on what is right for me.

Looking at getting a wheel for my new desk set up. My research has pointed me in the direction of direct drive but my budget is entry level. I'm definitely more of a casual racer than a serious sim racer. I used to be massively into the likes of Gran Turismo and Grid a decade ago. But since moving to PC haven't found a more serious PC racer I like.
Recent games I've played are the likes of Forza Horizon and Wrekfest with the current staples being Beam.ng and Euro/ American Truck simulator. However with getting a wheel perhaps I look at Asseto Corsa etc. (Any suggestions for a Gran Turismo replacement are welcome).

So now for the question that I'm sure has been asked a billion times before.

R3 or R5?

My Budget says R3, but I am considering stretching for the R5 for the nicer wheel Material and more torque and potential future proofing. I don't want to outgrow the wheel. But I also don't want to over spend on something I'll never utilise. And that's where I'm a bit stuck - trying to find the sweet spot between - just enough performance and frustration it doesn't do what I want.

For context I'm quite handy IRL with cars, I circuit raced competitively for a couple of seasons until I ran out of money, I am passable at sliding a car around. The point I'm making is that I know what it all should feel like IRL - which is what has frustrated me in the past when trying other friends FFB wheels. I know it's never going to be the same as IRL I just would like it to be good enough to not wind me up/ communicate enough so I know what's going on. I had some old wheel on PS3 that I hated, I could never understand what was going on. So I'd like to avoid that experience again

Does the R3 have enough torque to self steer when drifting?

Will the R5 rip my desk apart? (Standard electric sit stand upside down T shaped legs)

Is there a night and day differencebetween the two?

I'm going to be able to try the R5 at a local computer shop in a sim rig. But won't be able to try the R3 to compare.

Generally feeling a bit lost and worried about sinking a considerable amount of money and getting the wrong one. All reviews I've looked at are from serious sim racers and so their perspective is going to be different to my "super good enough" goals.

Any wisdom appreciated.